For those who question "Why me, God?" Here's a beautiful quote for enduring a calamity

I read this somewhere and it really helped me so I want to share it with everyone

"When a calamity befalls a believer he begins making dua constantly, but he may not see any sign of response for some time. when he is close to despair Allah the Almighty  looks into his heart to see if he is pleased and content with the decree and not hopeless or discouraged. If this is his situation then the response comes quickly. this contentment and pleasure in Allah's decree is what reforms and fixed the iman as well as destroys syaitan. That moment when the believer is close to despair is when the real men/women are determined. So, be aware of why the response is delayed. Understand that he is the Master and that He is the Most Wise in Planning, the Most Knowing of what will lead to the reformation of His slaves. Know that He wants to put you through trials to test what you hide in your heart and that he wants to see your Humility and that He wants to reward you for your patience. Thus, when the trial begins. The supplications are lengthened and the one in hardship shows his need and takes refuge in Allah. He will be content with everything."

Thank you to whoever you wrote this because before I read this, I failed. It was like I was sitting for an exam but I kept failing because I had no clue how to answer the question. Each time the trial occurred and when things got too much, I started questioning God "why?" and the thing was I knew it was wrong to question "why?" and then I felt guilty for doing so...felt bad about myself and I fell into that downward spiral. However, the amazing thing was that God kept pressing the 'RESET' button and each time I failed, He gave me another chance and then I felt that I was back to square one. After reading the above message, I realized that the 'RESET' button that God pressed for me was a blessing, an opportunity for me to sit for the test again, and again, and again until I finally got it right!

I realized that I had to prove myself. I had to go through the trial and actually remain patient, persevere and to accept the test that He put me through. I had to cleanse and purify my heart from the weaknesses hiding in there, and weaknesses I have in abundance. So, I became determined...to prove my worth to God. The trial I went through took its cause and as it progressed, I started looking forward to reach the deepest darkest part in order to prove my worth, to show my patience and acceptance. Alhamdulillah.

Most of us mere mortals will question 'why?' and we may at that deepest darkest point in life even question our faith or say the TABOO WORDS of 'why me God?, why me?"

When someone reaches that pit. Do not judge them. Do not say "Astaghfirullah! you are a bad person!" or accuse them for lack of iman! In truth, I didn't doubt God. I doubted myself. I doubt that I had the strength to go through such test. I doubt that I was able to come out the other side. We just need to keep reminding each other that "Allah does not burden a soul more than one can bear." Remind each other that nothing ever happens in this universe without His permission. We can say to them that "When God put you through the test, He knows that you can handle it. Yes! insyaAllah you are strong enough and that is why the test was given to you." Sometimes the person just needs words of encouragment, a listening ear or perhaps a helping hand.

NB: Thank you for releasing me. I love you. You are beautiful and amazing. 

Elixir of life and true happiness

"Choose to be happy" the title of a book I'm reading. I love it, it is funny, makes me think and gives me good quotes to share on Facebook. There's this part of the book that talks about acceptance of the aging process but at the same time, do not accept unhappiness as part of it. The author says very simply "Aging is a natural process of life and you are either going to get old or die young - take your pick." but the author also says that we should "never lose the child inside you."

Well, that doesn't mean we must remain childish, spoiled and immature, It just means that we do not have to grow old miserable and bitter. When I think about my life and watching my children grow up, I can't think of a better stage to be in (Alhamdulillah). 

Why not? as a baby or toddler, we hardly knew what's going on and if we're lucky, we would have loving and nurturing parents. As a school aged child, school (no matter how fun) was still a drag. There's homework, studying, stress of exams and school rules! Give me a million pounds, I still wouldn't want to go through all that a second time around. As a teenager, there's peer pressure, finding one's identity, having to conform to what is 'cool' and what isn't. I hated all that "conforming" and at the same time, you either conform or rebel. I chose to rebel. Well, that was not great either. 

Then, going through medical school, I don't know how I survived it. I used to get nightmares even after many years of getting my degree. Yup! nightmares on having to sit for exams. At the same time, there was the stress of finding the "right" person, getting married and finding out whether you're compatible or not. Then, before you know it the baby arrives, there's nappies, milk bottles, waking up at night and baby stains all over your clothes.   

What about working life? Yup! you're having to "prove" your worth and climb up the ladder, there's always some miserable soul out there who is stabbing people from the back and office politics blah blah...at the same time, you work too hard and earn too little and struggling to make ends meet. You're juggling work, house work and babies...and before you knew it, you look in the mirror and you have no idea who is the person staring back at you. 

Finally, you come to a stage where you realize "YOU KNOW WHAT! NOTHING MATTERS THAT MUCH!". You start to slow down and instead of 'chasing' life...why don't you just enjoy the process of living. All your dreams and things in this world that you were chasing after...it is not the ultimate goal. Yes...it is important to have a career, to have family, to have a life partner, to have good friends but after having it all, you realize that the thing that can truly satisfy is the remembrance of Allah SWT and doing things for his sake alone. Do your work well because you want to please Him by fulfilling your obligation as a worker. Look after your children well because you want to gain the reward of being a good mother or father. Treat people well because you want Allah SWT to write you down with good deeds. 

At this stage, you would have found yourself, you know who you are and you know what you want; or at least what you don't want. You know what's important to you and what's not important. You have developed that inner confidence and know your self worth. You no longer bother too much if people like you or not and peer pressure? forget that! You have your principles and you know what is right and wrong especially as a Muslim, Islam has defined it clearly for you. You are not so easily influenced and not bother too much about what people say about you to your face or behind your back. You became more self reflective, if you think you are wrong then you attempt to improve yourself but if you think you are right, then let the whole world say you're wrong and it doesn't matter. 

You take one day at a time, knowing that problems have a way of solving itself as long as you take the pro active measures to work things out. You stop worrying too much because you realize worrying will not help situations, doing practical and necessary steps will. You don't worry about the future because you come to believe and be convinced more and more that the future is in Allah's hands and He determines everything. You only need to fulfill your part of the bargain, which is to carry your responsibility. 

You realize at last that money does not buy happiness. It can buy you food, clothing, shelter, medicine and education, help you pay the bills and transportation which are the essential needs of modern living but it won't buy you happiness. Also, time and time again you come to understand that although accountancy makes perfect sense and budgeting is an important skill but there's also such a thing as "magic". Well, more like Rizk min Allah. Do you ever wonder why if you're feeling tight and struggling financially that you are told to give some money for charity or do a good deed for someone? Well...that is the magic. The more you give, the more God gives you back. 

So, I guess this is growing up...maybe this is what they call maturity. I don't know...but I certainly know that most of us feel comfortable at this stage of our lives Alhamdulillah. So, enjoy life...and do it in the way the follows the guidance (Qur'an and sunnah), be grateful for every single day and every single breath and give attention to little things like birds singing, children's laughter, sipping coffee...all these pleasures in life. 

KL ZOMBIE....terrific! *spoilers*

Another fun and entertaining movie for our local actor Zizan. Me and kids loved it! and my favorite bit is that the women (and girl) kicked ass. Yup! that's what we need some Malay women movie kicking ass for a change and not just crying and going "tolong! tolong!" like whims with no back bone.

As much as the dramas and movies are 'supposedly' a reflection of the society; I believe movie makers and script writers have a big role in influencing the mentality of a society. If our local movies keep portraying women as brainless, spineless and constantly being bullied then, indirectly that is the message we are passing and subconsciously, people start to believe that is the truth. However, if we portray women as strong, independent and able to defend oneself, we are sending a positive message regarding our women and hopefully, influence people to believe that is what they are and how they should be treated i.e. with respect! 

Apart from the 'ass kicking' the movie is also funny and at times, a bit scary...although, the idea of zombies dominating the world, infecting everyone is far from unique but I like this version of zombie apocalypse because it has local culture within it. It is not a carbon copy of Hollywood or Bollywood. It is essentially a Malay movie.

Also, unlike other movies where "LOVE" is the only theme with nothing else happening in the whole entire movie. In this movie, love is just a side-line or a side menu with the "running away from zombie" and fighting for survival as the main theme. Yup! Truly enjoyed this movie.

Let's have more Malay movies with strong kicking ass women and other issues being the theme such as "fighting for the survival of our rain forest" or "against pollution" or "better road safety". I mean we have so many issues to make a movie of other than love or ghost.

Dedicated to stay at home moms and working moms

I am playing stay at home mom at the moment (a few days of annual leave) and despite feeling absolutely shattered and also developing a sore throat from too much shouting, I feel great! I love it!

I have forgotten how nice it feels to pick up the children from school, prepare the food for them, help them with homework and to actually make sure the house runs like clockwork. Often women are subjected to criticism for working and accused of being "career minded" or neglecting the children. However, that is far from the truth. In today's very demanding and financially challenging world, most women are forced to work. Some are single parents, some have to supplement the income of the husband and some have husbands who don't work (for whatever reason). In majority of cases, women work because it is a necessity and given the choice, they would love to be a stay at home mom and look after the welfare of the children themselves.

Wish people would stop pointing fingers and make assumptions about working moms. It would be great if men are back to becoming "bread winners" and expected to provide primarily but that's not happening yet. InsyaAllah maybe as the Islamic understanding of the roles between men and women become clearer and that the responsibility of providing is handed back to our XY gender.

However, it is important to make the best of every situation and to enjoy whatever challenge is given to us. If you enjoy whatever you are meant to do, that is half of the work done. The other half is just the practicalities. So, here I am after a very long day just sipping tea and listening to the news, Alhamdulillah enjoying this moment.

To our stay at home moms who have taken the decision to run around like crazy all day. Well done! and to our working moms who despite loving their jobs, would still love to manage a bunch of screaming kids instead; well hang in there. You know why you're doing what you're doing. Whatever it is, do it with the intention to please Allah SWT and none of your efforts will be wasted insyaAllah!

Struggle and defense against evil, Iblis the cursed one

I'm reading surah Al-Hijr which is chapter 15 from the Qur'an.

The Qur'an is simply amazing.

No matter how many times you read it, there's always something that touches your heart or stimulates your mind.

From ayat 28 to 42, Allah SWT tells us the event that took place at the time when Adam (our great ancestor),was created. Allah SWT tells us about the interaction that happened between Himself and Iblis. Yes, Iblis - the first evil (also referred to as Syaitan)


Allah SWT said,

"So, when I have fashioned him (Adam) completely and breathed into him (Adam) the soul which I created for him, then fall you (the Angels) down prostrating yourselves to him. So the angels prostrated themselves, all of them together. Except for Iblis - he refused to be among them (to prostrate). Allah said, "O Iblis! What is your reason for not being among the prostrators? Iblis said, "I am not the one to prostrate myself to a human being, whom You created from dried clay of altered mud." Allah said, "Then, get out from here (paradise) for verily, you are Rajim (an outcast or cursed one) And verily, the curse shall be upon you until the Day of Recompense (Resurrection). Iblis said, "O my Lord! Give me time (respite) till the Day The dead will be resurrected. Allah said, "Then verily, you are of those reprieved, Till the Day of the time appointed. Iblis said, "O my Lord! Because you misled me, I shall indeed adorn the path of error for them (mankind) on the earth, and I shall mislead them all. Except Your chosen (guided) slaves among them." Allah said "This is a Way which will lead straight to Me. Certainly you shall have no authority over My slaves, except those who follow you of the Ghawun (those who go astray)."


I am far from qualified to give a tafsir (interpretation) regarding this verses but nevertheless there are so many lessons and points to be taken here and most of these points are well known to all Muslims. I just wanted to share the points I received from this beautiful surah MashaAllah.



The first point that Iblis believed in Allah SWT as the Creator, he called him "Rabbi" (My Lord) and even acknowledged that it was Allah SWT who misled him. Iblis did not say that Adam misled him. We must believe from TAWHEED that Allah SWT is the Most Powerful. There is nothing more Powerful than Him, and certainly not Iblis. Iblis does not have power.



Secondly, Iblis became the cursed one (an outcast) because of his pride. He was too arrogant to bow down to Adam despite his years and years of believing and worshiping Allah SWT but he refused to follow a simple instruction due to pride. BE VERY CAREFUL OF OUR PRIDE and if we sense any PRIDE within us then we must try to overcome it.



Thirdly, Iblis (syaitan) looks down on us. Iblis believes he is superior to Adam because he was created from fire but Adam was created from mud. In Surah Al Anam ayat 142 it is stated that "Surely he (Syaitan) to you an open enemy". (also 35:6 and many others) So, as humans we should know that our enemy do not think much of us. Our enemy believes he is better than us, more superior in his nature and if anything, he has vengeance towards us. So, let us not be in awe of Iblis or think that we can negotiate with him!



Fourthly, Iblis asked Allah SWT for two things. He asked for a long life i.e. to live until the day of resurrection and he asked Allah's permission to mislead humans from Allah's TRUE PATH. We must remember that Iblis has ONE MISSION in the long life that he has which is to mislead us, and he promised to mislead us in every possible way. He will use many different ways in many different parts of the world. He will threaten us with poverty (2:268), entice us with false desires (4:119-120), entice men with power and honour, get us to worship him instead of Allah SWT by committing Shirk, Sihir and Khurafat. Since I came back to Malaysia, I realize there's so much Sihir and Khurafat here. Please be careful not to commit this and if you think you have committed Shir or Khurafat, cepat-cepatlah bertaubat (repent quickly insyaAllah)



But finally, the good news is that Allah SWT says the Syaitan has no authority over mankind except if we follow him ourselves. Even Syaitan himself realizes that he has no power and no authority over us because on the day of resurrection, this is what he will say:

“And Shaitan (Satan) will say when the matter has been decided: ‘Verily, Allah promised you a promise of truth. And I too promised you, but I betrayed you. I had no authority over you except that I called you, and you responded to me. So blame me not, but blame yourselves. I cannot help you, nor can you help me. I deny your former act in associating me (Satan) as a partner with Allah (by obeying me in the life of the world). Verily, there is a painful torment for the Zaalimoon (polytheists and wrongdoers)’” (Quran, Ibraaheem: 22). 



However, I'm finding that we are in a dire situation. Things just seem pretty bad at the moment and it feels so hard to practice Islam in its totality. Sometimes it feels like there are so many holes on the wall and water is leaking from every hole and you' re struggling to fix these leaks. We are certainly being attacked from all directions as Syaitan has promised he would do (7:16-17). Is it not? our economic system is based on interest and profit, the society is based on free-mixing and it seems easier to commit the haram (wrong) actions than to remain on the straight path.



But there is a good reason for this. Islam came as a complete system and it protects us from the attack of our enemy (the Syaitan) at three levels:

1. The individual taqwa
2. The Islamic values of the society and it's promotion of taqwa
3. The implementation and enforcement of Shariah laws by the government



These three levels are complimentary and is meant to be our armour and guard against the enticement of Syaitan. Yet, today we do not have number (3). There is no Islamic state (Khilafah) to implement, promote and enforce Islam. Yes...it is true our third line of defense is missing.



On top of that, our community and society are slowly being influenced to adopt "liberal" viewpoints and acceptance of the non-islamic way of life. The society no longer promotes taqwa (fear and obedience to Allah SWT) but rather people are more willing to accept non-islamic values and ideas.



So, we are all left with only ONE defense mechanism which is the individual taqwa and that is difficult and dangerous because taqwa is the fear of Allah SWT, it is our awareness of Him. As humans, we are weak. We often forget, we are not aware of Allah's presence at all times. Sometimes our thoughts are clear and sometimes we are confused by other thoughts. Sometimes our feelings are stable but sometimes we get disturbed by negative feelings. On top of that the moment we feel that we are okay...that we will not be affected by the whisperings of Syaitan, that marks the beginning of our downfall because that is when we succumb to pride and arrogance.

So, what can we do?


Well, ideally we should bring the Khilafah back and work for it. InsyaAllah no doubt we should all yearn for the return of Islam as a complete system. I guess we could try at every level with our friends, family and community to re-instill our islamic values and promote an environment of taqwa in our homes, our community and workplace. Try to remind one another with patience and the truth (surah Al-Asr).


As for our own individual taqwa, I really don't know...I'm struggling with that every single day SubhanAllah but no matter what we must always believe

There is no power in this world but Allah SWT. 

He is kind, merciful and we should never ever lose hope in Him. No matter how bad we think we are and how much wrong and sins we think we have done. There is always hope in repentance and forgiveness from Allah SWT so, keep asking Him for guidance and forgiveness. May Allah SWT guide us and May He return Islam as a complete system and protect us from our enemy, Iblis the OUTCAST.

True "Idols" for Muslim girls and women today

Surah At Tahrim: 11-12

"And Allah has set forth an example for those who believe the wife of Fir'aun (Pharoah), when she said: My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Fir'aun and his work, and save me from the people who are Zalimun."

"And Maryam (Mary), the daughter of Imran who guarded her chastity. And We breathe into her through our ruh (Jibrail) and she testified to the truth of the Words of her Lord, and believe in the Scriptures and she was of the obedient (to Allah)"

As a Muslim girl growing up, I often thought it was unfair that men have so many examples to follow. Of course our Prophet Muhammad SAW was a man and he was the best of examples. Then there were great leaders e.g. Abu Bakar as Siddiq r.a., strong-willed man e.g. Umar Al Khattab r.a., a determined boy e.g. Ali r.a. , brave fighter e.g. Khalid al Walid, Jaafar bin Abi Talib, intelligent negotiator e.g. Mus'ab bin Umayr and many more...

I struggled to understand the true characteristic of a pious woman whom I should follow as an example, one who can be my "idol". Often the message given to girls are conflicting. We are often told to be a "wanita solehah" (pious woman) one has to be soft spoken, kind and sabar (patient). Yes! everything sabar...husband tak tanggung pon sabar...kene sepak terajang pon sabar*....Is that what we want our women to be? When a woman is opinionated and speaks her mind, she would be seen as "aggressive" or when she demands for her rights, she would be seen as a "gold digger" or "ungrateful". Basically, to be a "wanita solehah" one has to be brainless and easily bullied.

*husband not providing, being physically abused by husband

In a Capitalist world where men have embraced the concepts of "survival of the fittest" and "self gratification", we often find women subjected to unfair treatment and oppression. Most women nowadays work and they are expected to share 50% of the cost of living. In worse scenarios, they are expected to support their non-working husbands or even worse, having to take up bank loans and credit cards to support their extravagant male spouses. I'm sure we know of some women who are in severe debt or have gone bankrupt due to their husband's bad economic decisions and yet, in the end who is blamed? It would be the woman because she was being exactly what society expected her to be soft spoken, kind and patient...

Who is really brain-washing women to become like this? is it men i.e. man made law, customs, traditions or Islam?

As I read the beautiful verses of the Qur'an above, it made me realize about women and what are the true characteristics of a pious woman. 

Let's look at Maryam a.s. (the mother of Isa a.s). She was praised for her chastity, her obedience to God, that she kept herself isolated in worship to Allah SWT and that Allah SWT completed her. She didn't need anyone else... Even when she was about to give birth to Isa a.s. (the immaculate child), she secluded herself away from the people and gave birth to her baby in isolation, alone with Allah SWT as her protector.

The message here is a pious woman is one who worships Allah SWT alone, she keeps herself chaste and Allah SWT completes her (in her heart, soul, body and mind)

Then let's look to Asiah, the wife of Firaun. Firaun was the King of Egypt. He even claimed himself to be 'god' astaghfirullah! and yet, despite killing all the male infants of Bani Israel, he agreed to adopt Musa a.s. as their son because Asiah wanted to keep the child. That showed his love for her.

When Musa became a Prophet and taught people to worship Allah SWT alone, she believed in him and she went against Firaun, her husband. Out of fury, he tortured her but her response was not one of weakness or clinging to Firaun. She did not respond in the way that Malay dramas would like to depict a woman...falling at the feet of her husband, crying and saying something like "Oh Abang! sampai hati Abang buat saya macam ni. Maafkanlah saya Bang! " You know what I mean...that cringing scene that makes a woman look so pathetic causing my stomach to churn and feel this urge to vomit! I often wonder why does she has to apologize when usually it would be the husband that was having an affair or not fulfilling his responsibility or abusing her physically, mentally or emotionally.

Anyway, back to Asiah...wife of Firaun....

Instead of pleading to Firaun, Asiah turned to Allah SWT and prayed to Him to save her from Firaun and those who were oppressors. She asked for Allah SWT to build her a home in Jannah because she loved Allah more than anything else. She disobeyed her husband and turned against him for the sake of Allah.

the message here is: LOVE ALLAH SWT first above anyone else. Put everything in your hand (as sis Yasmin Mogahed would say) but not in your heart. Only keep Allah in your heart. Your husband is not your god Astaghfirullah! He is just a man whom if he fulfils his responsibilities towards you, Alhamdulillah but if he betrays you, then Allah is your protector and the One you hold dear to your heart.

Let's look at an example closer to our time. The best example of Khadijah r.a. (wife of Prophet Muhammad SAW). At the time when Muhammad SAW worked for her as a tradesman, she was 40 years old. She was a widower, rich, beautiful and highly intelligent. She had endless marriage proposals from leaders of Quraysh and rich tradesman. Yet, she refused to get married. She was contented with herself and her position.

The attraction she had towards Muhammad SAW was not based on his good looks. They hardly met face to face but she heard about him through her servant Maysarah. He often described Muhammad SAW as intelligent, reliable, honest, responsible and of course, he was known as the trustworthy (Al-Amin). Hence, it was these characteristics that prompted her to propose to him for marriage.

Good looks will fade in time but when you admire someone for their good characteristics, they will always have those qualities. When Khadijah r.a. married Muhammad SAW. He was an ordinary 20-year old man, an orphan with no great fortune or high status but yet, she saw something in him that made her admired and believed in him. Indeed, she was right...he became the best person ever and the best example for mankind.

Let the message to Muslim girls be this:

Build your relationship with Allah SWT first

Everyone else is secondary

Love Allah and put your complete Trust in Him

Abide by His laws and rules

Do not transgress His Limits, for whatever or whoever...

No one is worth disobeying Allah

Always remember that Allah SAW has given you your rights

He has given you self-worth

He has given you high status in Islam, as daughters, sisters, aunties, wives and mothers

Know your rights as a daughter, sister, aunty, wife and mother

You do not need anyone else to complete you

Only Allah SWT can complete you...

Shaping our lives with the solat (prayers)

In a hadith (transmission of the Prophet's sayings) it was narrated by Aishah R.A (the Prophet's wife) that the Prophet S.A.W (peace be upon him) said "The two Rak'ah before dawn (fajr) prayer are better than this world and all it contains." [Saheeh Muslim]


When I first came back to Malaysia four years ago, the first thing that awed me was waking up to the sound of the Adhan (the call for prayer). Nowadays I feel I am taking it for granted but I shouldn't. Waking up for the early morning prayer at around 5.50am is an amazing feeling. You get to breathe and enjoy the fresh air. The world is surrounded by serenity and not yet tainted by the hustle and bustle of life. The morning prayer is only two Rak'ah but what struck me about the hadith above is the merits of the two Rak'ah sunnah prayers before the actual obligatory prayer.


For most people like myself we have to mentally prepare for the rat race to get to work by 8 am. We may have to send our children to school, attend meetings, have deadlines or some would be doing groceries shopping, cooking and cleaning the house. Everyday we wake up to face a busy schedule ahead, full of daily chores but just take some time to consider this. Imagine waking up everyday knowing that you have achieved something greater than the whole world and everything in it? (as mentioned in the hadith above)

That would certainly start you off on a positive note and put you in a happy mood. By simply praying two extra Rak'ah you would be able to achieve all that.
 

Islam links all actions with specific concepts and character building exercise. It is unfortunate if we as Muslims simply do the rituals but do not imbibe the concepts to shape our mentality and emotions. Let's just take the prayer. Muslims are obligated to pray five times a day and although there is no argument that the only purpose and intention of our prayer is to worship Allah SWT alone yet, the prayer teaches us many things. It teaches us self discipline, concentration, organization and to do things in a systematic manner. We cannot pray in whichever way we want rather, there are sets of rules and regulations and particular order of things.


As we go through our busy day with tight schedules, we may feel that our 'breaks' for prayer is disruptive. We might become engrossed with work, shopping, watching TV or doing some worldly activities that we may feel burdened by the five prayers. Yet, we often forget the concept that the hereafter is the real life compared to this life which is temporary and only a test. Hence, by leaving the worldly activities to perform our obligatory prayers is a reminder for us that is the true destination, to leave everything to return to Allah SWT, to leave the dunya and concentrate on the real life which is akhirat. It is an affirmation to the concept we already hold in our mind about the next life and what is really important.

May Allah SWT make us and our children, our future generation to perform and LOVE the prayers...Ameen.

Merdeka! 31st August Malaysians celebrate Independence day

31st August 1957 marked the day that Malaysia officially achieved independence day. Each year, on this day there is a celebration marked by a national parade; boasting all of this countries' achievements, culture and military might. I was involved in this celebration back in 1990 when Sri Aman Girls School along with Assunta Girls School and Taman Petaling were performing a Malay-Chinese-Indian traditional dance. We were in year 4 of secondary school and that must be the only time I attended the national parade live at Dataran Merdeka (Merdeka Square).


THE VIDEO OF MERDEKA


However, in celebrating this memory we must never separate the celebration from the actual event. My little daughter asked me in the car, she said "I don't understand what 'Merdeka' means?" So, I had to explain to my children and it was difficult explaining to them because it involved both parts of themselves. I told her that once this country was colonized by the British. Being half English, it was difficult for her to understand what that meant for her. Trying to explain to her what "colonization" meant was even harder as she is still so young. However, my older children understood it quite well.


History is made of factual things as well as the emotional aspects and points of view. I wanted my children to understand the facts; as well as to recognize that the points of view of history often depends on what we believe in. I didn't want them to start self-loathing nor to have negative feelings towards their English half. However, they needed to know the facts and be able to critically evaluate what it meant.


If one believed in Capitalism and the exploitation of wealth then one would view colonization as a good thing. However, if one believed in humanity and are against exploitation then colonization would be bad as it meant exploiting another nation, extracting its wealth, 'enslavement' of the people either physically or mentally and often retarding them.


So, I gave them the facts. This part of the world have always been prosperous. It was laden by spices, tin, fertile land that was good for rubber and palm oil plantation. On top of that at one time, Malacca was a very popular trading port. Due to its resources and strategic position, it became a sought after place by emerging powerful Capitalist nations. The people in the Malay peninsular have embraced Islam and although (correct me if I'm wrong), it was never truly under direct Ottoman rule but it had strong links with the Ottoman Empire and was under its protection.


The first Western Capitalist nation to occupy Malacca was the Portugese followed by the Dutch and finally British who managed to secure the whole of Malaysian peninsula in 1824. After more than a hundred years of British rule, Malaysia finally achieved independence and the people finally had their country back.


However, the British did not leave us empty handed. They gave us two things that were to shape our minds and system. It was a gift that would ensure that we would never truly be independent, at least not in the way we think...

The two gifts were:
1. Nationalism
2. Secular system

Nationalism was to ensure that we will forever be trapped within our own borders. The concept of a borderless nation or to form unity for the Muslim ummah became a far-fetched idea. The once great empire of the Muslims starting from the time the Prophet Muhammad SAW sent his army on expeditions to Syria, which was then under the Roman Empire and Persia until Islam spread to 2/3rds of the world became awesome stories in history books. Nationalism ensured that we will never rise again as one ummah and any attempt to break those borders will be met with fighting and resistance.

Don't get me wrong....I'm not saying we should open our borders for attack or to allow infiltration of our borders by negative elements. I am talking about the imprisonment of the mind...

Let's say for argument sake the Khilafah, a true Islamic state were to be re-established tomorrow. Would we be ready to give up our borders and be part of this state? To give our bay'ah to the Caliph (Khalifah)? Don't answer it yet...just think about it!



The other gift is secularism....or more specifically a secular system with secular laws i.e. laws that are man-made enshrined within the constitution. A law that states Islam as the official religion and that is as far as it goes...but when it comes to making laws; the reference is not Qur'an and Sunnah. Essentially that is what secularism is...religion is fine as long as it stays personal or a logo or a symbol but never to be used as something to solve daily problems, political problems, economic problems, social problems, foreign policy, judiciary or anything that involves governing the people.

There is no point in pointing fingers or accusing the people in the past for what has happened today. History is a lesson for us to be better in the future. It is however good to recognize that the secular system has been embedded so deeply within this country that any attempt to replace it is met with such strong resistance sometimes by the Muslims themselves. There have been attempts to bring more shariah laws within this country by various groups but it is often still trapped within the secular framework.


I'm not claiming to be an expert nor do I have all the answers but I do know ONE THING...which is what I am pointing out here, we may be physically independent. Theoretically we are in charge of this country...theoretically we seem to be able to determine the future of this country but in our minds are we truly independent? For the Muslims let us ponder...are we truly independent from our colonial past? Can we really fulfil our roles and function as the one who was created to worship Allah SWT alone, in our daily life, rituals as well as our public life and how we govern our nation?

It is a joyous moment to hear the words of our respected Bapa Kemerdekaan Tunku Abdul Rahman [CLICK HERE] when he shouted "Merdeka" back in 1957 and I can't imagine how it must have felt for the people at the time...but as we celebrate this event each year, let's question ourselves...how truly independent are we?

Celebrating Eid Malaysian style

Can't believe it is almost a month after Ramadhan. Was so looking forward to it and now, it's gone and was so looking forward to Eid and now, it has also come to pass. Eid celebration in Malaysia is for a month...it is not sunnah of course since Eid-ul Fitri is only for one day. However, Malaysians love food and eating. We have this thing called 'open house' and I supposed once upon a time, when Malays lived in the village...open house would literally mean that you open your house for anyone to come and eat. However, nowadays open house is an invitation only.

Since Eid which was on the 8th August 2013, we have been attending open houses every weekend. Often there are 2 or 3 invitations in a day; sometimes more. It is during these open houses that we tend to meet people we haven't seen in the last year or sometimes for several years. You know old school mates and distant cousins; it is a great time for silatur Rahm with family members and also a good time to catch up and re-connect with old friends.

This is something I totally love about Malaysia. It is a very sociable country. Eid in UK was very different for me. There were times when I barely celebrated Eid as I was on-call or working at the hospital. However, as I developed close friendships with some of the Muslims in Britain; especially those who didn't have any family members...we formed our own tradition. There was a group of us who would gather for breakfast on Eid day and spend the day together. Later on...we even had a Eid night gathering starting from just before Maghrib. I remembered once me and the sisters were laughing so much that we said, it had to be Eid because the Syaitan must have been released from their prisons.

So, I had some good memories of Eid in the UK but I guess nothing could beat spending Eid with family. All the kids running around and eating the special Eid food of ketupat, rendang...well my mom's specialty is actually asam pedas and sambal goreng pengantin (Singaporean dish). On the night of Eid, we would pray Maghrib together, read the Takbeer, have a feast and kids would play fireworks. We spread mattresses on the floor so the kids can just fall asleep when they get tired.

Eid is a beautiful time but it is also a sad time knowing that Ramadhan has left us...at least for another year. I miss Ramadhan and soon Syawal too will come to pass...but we have Hajj to look forward to and then Awal Muharram and Asyura and before we know it, Ramadhan will reappear. There's so much to do within that time, so much to maintain, so much to improve...so many problems in the Muslim world that needs to be resolved.

Every year, we hope for a better Ramadhan...for the Muslims to start fasting on the same day. For the wars to end...for peace...for Muslims to unite...for Khilafah to be re-established. Maybe next year...insyaAllah.

Celebrating the differences between men and women in Islam

So many of us have been away from Malaysia for a long time, living abroad for many years. I guess we missed a lot of developments and changes that happened in this country, economically, politically, infrastructure and mentality. Sometimes I have forgotten all the things that I experienced when I was growing up here and sometimes I expect that maybe things have changed.


However, my recent chat with my teenage daughter made me wonder if some things have changed at all. She is expressing the same disatisfaction and heart-ache that I felt when I was growing up as a young Muslim girl in this country especially in terms of the gender inequality and the views of men and women in Islam.


Fortunately for me, I was given the opportunity to study abroad and to experience the struggle of the western women and feminists in a male dominated society and to find answers in the gender equality in Islam. Fortunately for my daughter, she has someone to try and explain to her these issues and I pray to Allah SWT that I will be able to explain this to her, to make her understand that Islam is perfect and balanced in the way it regulates men and women as well as the relationship between the two genders.


I dedicate this to my children, my girls and my boys and anyone else who feels this aching in their chest whenever the issue of gender inequality is raised.

The first thing that humans should know is that men and women are created equal. We are EQUAL but NOT THE SAME. We have biological differences and physical capabilities.


WE ARE EQUAL that both are slaves to Allah SWT, that we are both subjected to His rules and laws, that we are both demanded to worship Him alone, that He will reward us, both men and women for our good deeds.


Surah An Nisa:124 "And whoever does righteous good deeds, male or female, and is a (true) believer such will enter paradise and not the least injustice, even to the size of a speck on the back of a date-stone, will be done to them."

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He has made some obligations equal for both men and women e.g. the five daily prayers, the fasting in Ramadhan, the Hajj, the Zakat, the da'wah. He has made things that are forbidden equal to both men and women such as drinking alcohol, eating pork, taking riba (usury) and committing zina. The punishment for those who commit haram are equal for both men and women.


There are some who deceive themselves to believe that "it is okay for men to fool around with women because they can marry more than one" but this is a lie and is not the sunnah of the Prophet SAW in his practice of polygamy. Allah SWT made lowering of the gaze, for men to not look at women and women to not look at men an obligation for both parties. (Surah an Nur: 30-31)

However, men and women are NOT THE SAME. Men have been given the physical strength and leadership qualities for a good reason whilst women have been blessed with capacity of child birth and nurturing qualities for a good reason.




Is this gender equality??

Unlike western feminism that makes men the standard and women having to constantly prove themselves to be as good, or the mentality of whatever men does, a women can do better, Islam does not promote a competition between men and women in their capabilities other than the competition to attain TAQWA. Islam does not discriminate either of the sexes but celebrates these differences with promise of immense reward.



Unlike the west that looks down upon the natural gift of women as the vessel of life, a mother. Islam raises the women status above the men for her very nature of being a mother.

Abu Hurairah (radi Allahu anhu) reported that a person came to the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) and asked: “Who among people is the most deserving of my fine treatment?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied: “Your mother.” He then asked, “Who next?” The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied: “Your mother.” He asked again: “Who next?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said again, “Your mother.” He again asked, “Then who?” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “Your father.” [Sahih Bukhari]

On the other hand, Islam raises the level of a man as the leader, the protector and provider. He leads, he is responsible, he works and he provides for the family. (Surah An Nisa: 34)

This is a responsibility of a man. Allah SWT gave him the responsibility to protect and fight for His Cause, to protect the weak and needy and the act of Jihad and syahid is linked to immense reward. Protecting, jihad fi sabillah is NOT a choice but an obligation for all able bodied men.


Surah An Nisa:75 "And what is wrong with you that you fight not in the Cause of Allah, and for those weak, ill treated, and oppressed among men, women and children, whose cry is: "Our Lord! rescue us from this town whose people are oppressors; and raise from us from You one who will protect, and raise form us from You one who will help."

Women have an important role as mothers and nurturers. She has a responsibility to look after her home and kids and she is rewarded immensely for her actions. However, she is also given the rights to own property, inheritance, to work and to contribute actively within society. It is an obligation for her to seek knowledge and to be able to raise her children with physical health as well as strong adherence to the Deen and understanding.


Even though she is allowed to work but this is HER CHOICE, unlike men where there is NO CHOICE. The man is the bread-winner, the main provider and if a woman chooses to work, she only supplements the needs of the family and herself. NO WOMEN SHOULD BE FORCED TO WORK or WORSE, TO PAY FOR HER HUSBAND'S DEBTS AND CREDIT CARDS.


All researchers know the difference between a PRINCIPAL INVESTIGATOR (PI) and a co-investigator, a lawyer knows the difference between the partner and the salaried lawyer, doctors know the difference between the specialist and the masters student. The difference is in the degree of responsibility and responsibility weighs more than the title or status. Hence, a man is the leader of the family and he shoulders the burden of providing, protecting and leading.


Islam has given both men and women GREAT EXAMPLES TO FOLLOW

The Prophet SAW is the best example. He is an example for men as the best leader, the best husband, the best father and the best sahabah. We have great leaders as examples such as Abu Bakr As-Siddiq, Umar Bin Al-Khattab, Uthman Bin Affan, Ali bin Abi Talib, Abdullah Ibn Umar and many more. Leaders who are strong in character, decision makers, strong fighters and yet, kind, loving and gentle towards their women, elderly and children.

These are the YARDSTICK for Muslim men and a standard that needs to be upheld.

As for women, we have been given the example of Asiyah the wife of Firaun, Maryam the mother of Isa, Khadijah r.a, Fatimah r.a and Aisya r.a. These are strong women who loved Allah SWT and the Messenger more than anyone else.

The examples of women are those who PUT THEIR LOVE AND TRUST IN ALLAH SWT ALONE. Asiyah the wife of Firaun went against him by believing in the ONENESS OF ALLAH SWT and when Firaun tortured her, she only called to Allah SWT and said (At Tahrim: 11) "And Allah has swt forth an example for those who believe: the wife of Firaun when she said "My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Firaun and his work and save me from the people who are Zalimun."

So, refrain from looking to the west for answers in solving the issues of gender inequality rather embrace the truth of Islam in its definition of the rights and responsibilities of men and women.

Capitalism has reduced our community to love the dunya and fear death, instill the DISEASE OF WAHN in our men that they fear to die for the sake of Allah SWT and clinging on to the luxuries of this world. Capitalism has reduced men to beings that are subjugated by desires and lust, to commit haram and even syirk (sihir/khurafat) in order to attain the things they covet in wealth and women, preventing them from taking the just and right actions and fulfilling their responsibilities as leaders, husbands and fathers.



Capitalism has promoted women to fight for freedom BUT DUPED them into believing that freedom equals the selling of her body as a commodity and yearning for love and acceptance by men until she no longer values herself as the honoured servant of Allah SWT, the Almighty.

Ya Allah! May we be those who LOVE YOU ONLY and do not make us love anyone more than we love YOU. Fill our hearts with the remembrance of YOU for syaitan is eager to enter an empty heart...and protect us from the evil actions and intentions of others. Ameen.

The Journey of life: What truly matters?

My grand auntie passed away yesterday in Teluk Intan, Perak. I don't even know exactly how old she was, only that she was old but whenever I saw her, she always had a smile on her face. She never complained and she always said good things. My grandmother died when I was little and I was truly inspired by her. I knew my 'nenek' was very close to my grand auntie and I looked towards her as a source of closeness to my own grandmother. I guess they were similar in many ways, religious and prayed a lot, always said good and kind words and had sound knowledge of the Deen.



I've been thinking about this life and how it is a linear journey. Talking about it to my children the other day and telling them how I was in their shoes once upon a time. In the beginning when you were young, life is about looking forward. You are moving ahead through time, constantly looking towards the front. You grow everyday, learning and absorbing knowledge of the world, you go to school to get an education, you start to think about what you want to be when you grow up, who might be your life partner and the children you might have. You are egocentric and are mostly concerned about yourself and your immediate surroundings. You may even go through the rebellious teenager stage but still knowing that one day, you will be have to be a responsible adult, to earn your own living and look after a family.



However, as you approach the half way journey from the time your life begins and where your life will end....you are still looking ahead but you are also starting to look behind you. You start to look into that rear view mirror to see the things you left behind, the things you have achieved in your life. You start to think about the things you have achieved in your career, the knowledge you attained, the children you have, the people who have coloured your life and those whom you have helped or helped you. You look behind to evaluate your achievements and to help you figure out all the things you still want to achieve in life.



At this half way mark, you start to re-evaluate your life on what things are important. You may still have certain career things you would like to achieve like furthering your studies or attaining awards or titles, you start to reflect upon your own childhood in your children and how you want better things for them, to be more successful than yourselves, to not make the same mistakes. It is almost as though you re-live your beginnings through them, first day of school, silly arguments with friends and making up afterwards, getting told off by teachers, the fear of getting in to trouble for not bringing the right books to school, watching the sun rise for the first time, going on a long car journey and staring outside the window. Children make you feel young because when you see things through their eyes, everything is new, exciting and interesting.


At this point in your life, you start to think about your contributions to society and what have you done to make life better for others? I guess that is why many people start doing voluntary work at this stage, although there are also many who start earlier on in life. Anyway, you realize that there is a bigger world out there and you are an insignificant tiny dot amongst so many other dots. Maybe you feel more stable and established in your own lives and career to start thinking about helping others, although I do admire people who start charity or voluntary work at a young age.



Then, you look at your parents and realized how old they have become....and how they behave as though they have come towards the end of their lives. My dad once told me that at his age, he looks forward and sees only one thing: AFTERLIFE. Towards the end of the journey, this life is about looking back and what you have achieved. You rearview mirror gets magnified and at that moment, even your career no longer takes centre stage....all titles disappear....your strength wanes and the only thing that seems to put a happy smile on your face is listening to the laughter of your grandchildren.



Hence so is life and we are all heading that way....
When I look to the future and as I look pass all the things I am still hoping to achieve in my career, my young children, my dreams of running away on a charity mission or circumbulating the Kaabah, touching the great wall of China, marvel at the Taj Mahal and the geisers in New Zealand. Well, looking past all of those dreams that insyaAllah will one day come true, I would simply like to see at the end of it a woman who is constantly smiling, saying good and kind words to her children and grandchildren, never misses to pray on time and still having sound knowledge and sound mind....I wish to be like my grandmother and my grand auntie. They are my true "idols".

An account of reading about the ingredient to successful marriage in Islam

In sister Yasmin Mogahed's book there is a chapter on "a successful marriage: the missing link"

Too many marriages amongst muslim couples nowadays are unhappy and sometimes we wonder why when Allah SWT has given us the best guidance to follow. I would read the words of Allah, “And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquillity with them,  and He has put love and mercy between you; verily in that are signs for people who reflect.” Al Qur’an 30:21

I used to wonder how does this verse refer to today? Where can one find any tranquillity in marriage?

In her book, sis Yasmin quoted Dr Emerson’s work that says: The love she most desires; the respect he desperately needs.

Allah SWT is the One who made all of us, whether men or women and it all fits into a perfect picture when Allah gave the responsibility for men to be protectors and maintainers of women (Al Qur’an 4:34). Men are given the leadership role and women naturally look up to their men to lead them. It is virtually impossible for a woman to respect a man who does not fulfil his leadership duties.

Often we hear those who blame the fall of the Muslims on the western cultural invasion that led to muslim women taking off their headscarfs and going to work. However, Islam does not forbid women from working and nowadays most women in Malaysia wear the headscarf. So, isn’t that the real destruction of this ummah occurred when leadership was taken away from men?

When the Khilafah was destroyed, the role of men as protectors and maintainers were downplayed until some men are unashamed to let their wives support them. In the Malay community, it is not unheard of where husbands demand their wives to go to work or husbands demand the working wife to pay for half the expenses which is by right, his responsibility. There have been horror stories of husbands forcing the wives to pay for their debt or a man unable to provide and yet, taking on second, third or four wives.

If respect is what men desperately needs then, Allah SWT has made them leaders, protectors and bread winners. Their position as the leader, the one who protects, the one who provides automatically puts them in a higher position of respect. At the same time, Allah SWT and the Prophet SAW taught the men to treat their wives with love and kindness, something she most desires.

The Prophet SAW said, “Take good care of women, for they were created from a bent rib, and the most curved part of it is its top. If you try to straighten it, you will break it and if you leave it , it will remain arched so take good care of women.”

This is an advice to men on how to look after women, not to try and fix her or change her. Unfortunately it has been used by some men to degrade women and to look down upon her as a ‘bent rib’.

With the demise of the Islamic state, men have lost their leadership role. The four positions of ruling in Islam, the Khalif, the Moawin (assistants of Khalif), Wali (Governors) and Qadi al Qoda (Judge of judges) are men only positions that cannot be taken up by women. This highlights the importance Islam places on men as leaders.

The other abandoned role of men is as protectors. When the Islamic state was destroyed, the army of Jihad ceased to exist. Jihad is an obligation for men and is their central role as protectors of the state and to defend the weak and needy. Again, a woman will look up to a man who is ready to protect her and the family.

The West has influenced this ‘equality’ argument that women too must work rather than the position of Islam where men MUST work but it is optional for women. This has made men believe that sharing of household income is 50:50 rather than the role of men as the sole provider. He must provide for the family whether the wife works or not.

The role of men as protectors and maintainers is so vital within the marriage institution that although divorce (talaq) is in the hands of the men but she is allowed to ask for divorce (fasah) if he doesn’t fulfil his role in providing and it is her rights to seek fasah in that situation.

We all want to see happy couples and the fulfilment of the ayat 30:21. However, the only way that such society of successful marriages can occur is when Muslims again refer to Islam rather than trying to copy the west. This requires the re-emphasis on men to fulfil their roles as protectors and bread winner. If respect is what men desperately need and love is what women desires then we need to revive the leadership position of men; and to put emphasis on women to respect their husbands and for husbands to treat their wives with love and affection.

Sometimes women take on board too much responsibility for her husband out of ‘care’ and ‘concern’ and she tries to change him or improve him. That is probably due to our nature of being mothers and how we are nurturers. It is okay to do so for your children but a husband is not a child. He is a grown man, a leader, a protector, a bread winner. Allah SWT has not made women responsible for men but the other way around so, just relax and remember the hadith that says; “When a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month of Ramadhan, guards her body and obeys her husband, it is said to her: Enter paradise from whichever door you wish.”

My thoughts and heart stimulated by Yasmin Mogahed's "Reclaim your heart"

As soon as I read the first page of Yasmin Mogahed's book "Reclaim your heart", I felt the light switch turned on inside my head. They say, a good book is one that creates thought in your mind that leads to other stimulating thoughts.


Sis Yasmin, your words touched not only my thoughts but my heart. If I wasn't in a busy café sipping on my bubbly tea (teh tarik) whilst reading your book, I would have simply burst into buckets of tears as I totally felt your words playing every single feeling that I had contained within me.


The first chapter on "Why do people have to leave each other?". A question that has been playing in my mind for a while. It is true what the book says...."the pain is a pointer to our attachments. That which makes us cry, that which causes us the most pain is where our FALSE ATTACHMENTS lie. and it is those things which we are attached to as we should only be attached to Allah which become barriers on our path to God."


I think about the real life stories of people I know whom have lost their loved ones through betrayal, separation or death. A young mom losing her beloved husband from cancer, a devoted loving wife betrayed by her cheating husband, a trusting person abandoned by a friend. The question in our minds is always "How could you do this to me?", "How could you leave me?", "How could you betray me?".


Yet, the answer is simple and putting accountability and responsibility placed upon each soul aside, the answer is our meeting and separation is in the hands of Allah SWT. When you left me...it was not your decision, it was not in your hands and you couldn't have stayed if you wanted to...neither could you have left if you wanted to. Allah decided our brief meeting and He took us away from one another. I have known it for a while but only now am I ready to understand.


He also takes those whom we love away for a reason...and the reason is always a good one as Yasmin says in her book "If we live in this world with our hearts, it breaks us. That's why this dunya hurts, it is because the definition of dunya (this life)  as something temporary and imperfect, goes against everything we are made to yearn for. Allah put a yearning in us that can only be fulfilled by what is eternal and perfect."


Only Allah SWT is eternal and perfect.


Everything else is weak, fragile, temporary and totally filled with imperfections like the book says, we are leaning against a twig which will definitely snap. When we start to depend on the things or people or places in this world...we are leaning against a twig that can never support our weight. Hence, when Allah SWT takes away the thing that we love so much; it is a blessing because He is reminding us NOT to become attach to this world. He is reminding us that it is in Him that we should be leaning against. He is reminding us NEVER to put anything above our LOVE for Him and that includes everything....even our parents, children, spouses, wealth, properties, positions etc...etc...


Most of us know this but when it comes to our hearts, our inclinations are often the hardest to tow the line.


Sometimes I believe, to experience false attachments and to be broken hearted is necessary in order for us to find the true source of attachment. If we never became lost...we would never appreciate finding the right way. Losing something we love from this world...teaches us to detach from it and to seek something greater and everlasting. It teaches us humility and to realize that we are weak; and strength comes only when we depend on Allah SWT.


Never regret any meeting even if it is a brief one because from each encounter, we learn something and from every hurt and pain, we emerge stronger and a better person insyaAllah.

Redang Lagoon Beach Resort: The Return 2013

After a great experience last year, we went back to Redang Lagoon.

When I went there last year, I was going through a difficult period of my life and needed that break so desperately. A change in environment to put things into perspective, to clear one's mind and to contemplate on things. One year on and our lives have changed dramatically. Life is stabilizing into a new routine, work is becoming more challenging and getting more involved in research activities.

Sometimes it is good to go back to a familiar place. So, we went back to Redang Island, a "paradise" island off the coast of Terengganu. We stayed at the same resort, Redang Lagoon. This time, we travelled a day earlier and stayed at Batu Buruk Chalet Resort for one night. It was an okay place as a stopover. The Batu Buruk beach is a beautiful sight but it is not suitable for swimming as the underwater currents are strong. The Resort has a swimming pool for children to dip into.

Batu Buruk Beach, Kuala Terengganu

Early the next morning, we headed towards Shahbandar Jetty in Kuala Terengganu and took the Sejahtera Ferry to Redang Island. Most resorts offer packages inclusive of ferry rides, four meals a day, accommodation and snorkeling activities. We reached Redang Island at 11am and checked into our room. The kids were so excited and headed straight for the beach. Lunch was provided for. We had rice with 3 meat dishes and 2 vegetables.




Redang Lagoon Beach Resort, Redang Island

After a short nap, we went for our first snorkeling trip in the open sea. The water was around 4 metres deep and we could see the corals underneath. We had our life jackets on and were taken there by very fit experienced lifeguards.

It was great swimming amongst the fishes. After tea, we headed for the beach again and went for a swim. It was incredible just swimming and gliding along with the fishes. Yes! there are also fishes near to the shore. We had our barbecue night and it was chicken, fish and cuttlefish. I stayed up late that night walking along the beach with my daughter, feeling the cool breeze and listening to music from nearby resorts.



Barbecue dinner at Redang Lagoon

On our second day, we rise up early at dawn prayer and watched the sunrise. After breakfast the lifeguards took us to Marine Park Fish Sanctuary for our second snorkeling session. Again, the underwater view was breath taking. It was nice to know that the people there remembered us from last year. We chatted to the owner of Redang Lagoon Resort who was such a nice lady. She used to be a lecturer but has now retired and spend nine months in a year at the island. Then, there were the lifeguards who were very funny but I couldn't understand half of their jokes. Just enjoy watching them swim around like dolphins. They are just such powerful swimmers.

Then, after lunch we had our third and final snorkeling trip. We came back to the resort and spent the rest of the afternoon lazing by the beach, swimming in the water and chasing after fishes.

Our guide showing off his swimming skills

The next day, after breakfast it was time to pack our things and check out from the resort. We had to wait for more than an hour before our ferry arrived. The journey back to the mainland took around 2 hours. I had parked my car near the Jetty at the Majlis Perbandaran carpark. It was a reasonable parking fee of RM9.80 for such a long stay. The entire package for 3 adults and 3 children cost me RM1600++ and we had to budget for the toll which was around RM30 (RM5 at KL-Karak, RM3 at Karak interchange and then RM21 for the Lebuhraya Pantai Timur), we exited at Jabor as the highway ended there. There was a bad traffic jam before Dungun due to road works. Petrol may cost around RM60 - RM70 one way and for equipment rental such as mask and life jackets is around RM10 per item. You may want to bring additional cash for souveneirs and titbits. There is a small shop at Redang Bay resort, next to Redang Lagoon where you can get drinks and basic necessities.

It was another incredible experience and we would definitely go back again in the future insyaAllah. There are many available resorts. If you are looking for a more expensive chalet type resort with your front door heading straight to the beach, you may want to check out Sari Pacific Beach Resort. Redang Lagoon Resort offers basic room with downstairs double bed and upstairs double mattress. It has own shower/toilet with solar powered hot water. (So no hot water in the morning). The chalets are traditionally made with wooden frames which is more to my liking.

What is the real strength in character? A lesson from a child

On Thursday, the last day of school my daughter's school was celebrating teacher's day and the children were told to wear nice clothes. Unfortunately due to a miscommunication, the message didn't reach me and my poor child went to school in her uniform. Her eyes filled with tears as soon as she saw her friends dressed up in beautiful baju kurung and the boys in baju melayu. I felt terrible but I took her hand, explained the situation to her class teacher and left her in good hands.

It may seem small but to a child...it is a first step in facing a hardship and dealing with disappointments. I watch my children grow up and see all the little hardships they face, the disappointments, the changes they have had to deal with, moving to a different country, changing schools, making new friends, going through a separation, adjusting to new family life; and sometimes it seems too much to handle but I see so much strength in them SubhanAllah! 

Life is full of hardships and disappointments but these difficulties are the building blocks of our strength and character.When I asked my brother who is an ex-MCKK "Would you send your boys to a boarding school despite all the stories we hear today of alleged bullying?" His answer was simply "YES" and his reasoning: it was those hardships that made him who he is today. It made him strong, resilient and a fighter. 

Everyone faces hardship but just by mere survival is not good enough. For a person to go through a test and to come out angry, bitter, vengeful and unrepentant does not do justice to the wealth that lies behind those hardships. Hardships are meant to shape us into better people, to elevate oneself to become wiser, more humble, more patient, more forgiving and more understanding. I consider this as true victory. Those who are cancer survivors and become volunteers for cancer support groups. Those who lose children through horrifying events and become champions in saving other families from similar fate. Those who survive through war and volunteers to help war victims. Those who go through difficult relationships and are able to solve their differences and become friends. 

I've had a fair share of frictions with various individuals throughout my life but we have been able to resolve matters and be friends. I have so much respect for them and are proud to be their friends, May Allah SWT reward them. 

So, when I picked my daughter up from school at the end of the day, I was pleased to see her smiling, laughing and playing with her friends. She had totally forgotten about what she was wearing and neither of us spoke about it. She was simply excited to tell me all about her interesting day of eating sweets and playing games, Alhamdulillah. 

"Remember, happy people have often experienced as much adversity as those who are unhappy. What sets them apart is that they have the good sense to manage their memories in a way that enriches their lives."

- Life lessons from the monk who sold his ferrari-

Resurgence of the Khilafah: Are we ready to accept?

In a previous post I expressed my despair of not believing in the Malaysian society and my own negative ideas that the muslims in this country are not ready to discuss the concept of Khilafah. I admit I was extremely wrong and recognize that one must never lose hope nor give up on the truth.

It seems that with the current climate, more and more people have expressed their awareness of the existence and history of our Khilafah system; established from the time of Rasullullah SAW until the moment of its destruction in 1924 (the Uthmani Khilafah)

I also came across an article titled "Khilafah & alam melayu" posted by Panglima silam highlighting the relationship between the Uthmani Khilafah and this part of the world as well as the protection that the Khilafah gave to us at the time. History highlighted the fact that this part of the world is a land of Ushr; a land conquered without any form of fighting because the sultan and the people of this land embraced Islam willingly. It was reported in Java, Raja Srivijaya sent a letter to Muawiyah and Umar Abdul Aziz accepting the protection of the Khilafah and in the year 718, Raja Srindravarman embraced Islam.

At this crucial moment where there is a strong realization of the split in the muslim votes in the last general election, questions are being raised about the true mechanism for unity. It is in the nature of this ummah to yearn for unity....because it is part of our belief in Allah SWT and His words, the Qur'an. Allah SWT says

The Noble Qur'an 3:103, 105And hold fast, all of you together, to the Rope of Allâh (i.e. this Qur'ân), and be not divided among yourselves, and remember Allâh's Favour on you, for you were enemies one to another but He joined your hearts together, so that, by His Grace, you became brethren (in Islâmic Faith), and you were on the brink of a pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus Allâh makes His Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.,) clear to you, that you may be guided.

Hadith - Sahih Muslim (3/1340) and Ahmad (2/367)
The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Indeed Allah is pleased with three things: That you worship Allah alone without associating any partner along with Him; that you hold fast altogether to the Rope of Allah and not to become split-up; and that you give sincere advise to whomever Allah put in charge of your affairs.”
The ummah is also aware of the internal and external plans to divide them and to attack the very foundation of the Islamic belief i.e Tawheed - to belief in the Oneness of Allah SWT. Him alone holds Power, the One and only creator of the universe. This understanding and concept needs to be upheld and protected by all Muslims.

http://www.globalresearch.ca/malaysia-failure-of-u-s-to-subvert-the-elections-and-install-a-proxy-regime/5334439

In this current climate, all islamic groups / parties / organizations working towards permanent change should take the opportunity to explain to this ummah about the islamic aqeedah and the beautiful Khilafah system that governed 2/3rd of the world with justice.

I am not postulating that the Khilafah can be re-established here and certainly maybe NOT within the next 5 years Wallahu A'lam but there is glimmer of hope that the people are ready to accept the concept of Khilafah as an alternative system to the current system....at least to consider and think about it.

وَمَكَرُواْ وَمَكَرَ اللّهُ وَاللّهُ خَيْرُ الْمَاكِرِينَ (3:54)