Monday 31 October 2011

My health screening experience at Ketereh, Kelantan

Just spent the last 3 days in Kota Bahru, Kelantan. I've always wanted to go to Kota Bahru and finally, two nights ago I landed at Kota Bahru airport with two of my work colleagues. We took a cab to the city centre and checked in at Renaissance Kota Bahru.

There is something special about staying in a hotel. For me, it brings back sweet memories of childhood when my dad used to bring us along during his meeting trips around Malaysia. As a young child, it was exciting to stay in a hotel even if it means just watching TV inside the hotel room. I felt nostalgic and slightly pampered.

At the same time it made me feel sad to think about other children who may not have had the luxury of growing up in comfort. The path of lives for different people will be different but whatever our situation, rich or poor, this life is a test for everyone. I remembered my boss telling me that the more we have, it is more of a test for us because the person who has more, will have more to answer for on the day of judgment compared to a person who has nothing.

The next morning, we set off by cab to Ketereh where our health screening programme was held. It was a sharp turn on to a narrow kampung road, surrounded by trees everywhere going deeper into the wilderness until all of a sudden, there was a compound with buildings in front of us. In the middle of nowhere stood Rukun tetangga Hall but everyone around the area seem to be aware of its existence because we were greeted by a hall full of people waiting to get their bloods taken and blood pressure checked. Our health screening programme looks at cardiovascular risk factors mainly in the elderly but some in their 30s and 40s also joined in.

We went straight to work and my job was to take blood, review patients with hypertension and abnormal ECGs. It was rather scary to find many patients with undiagnosed high blood pressure or those who defaulted on treatment. Some even had evidence of undiagnosed previous myocardial injury from their ECG. Since we were only there to screen them so, I could only advice the patients and refer them to the nearest specialist centre. Most were stable and were happy walking around holding a referral letter.

After a hard day's work, we went shopping at Pasar Cik Fatimah and I could have bought the whole material shop. We had to drag ourselves away and ended up at KB Mall. We had some cake at Secret Recipe and walked 5000 steps back to the hotel, burning the extra calories consumed.

I was exhausted and as soon as my head hits the pillow, I fell asleep.

The next day, we went to the same site and repeated our routine yesterday, taking blood and assessing patients. The Kelantanese are so friendly, so welcoming and so generous. The atmosphere of the village was peaceful and inviting.

The people from the village caught a 7 kilogram fish yesterday and today, we had the tastiest fish cooked in Tempoyak dish. I've never loved Tempoyak before but this one was amazing... it beats any cuisine by any well known chefs in Malaysia.

Then, my big big boss whom we call Dato' took us to Pak Teh Rimau's home. He's known as such because during his younger days he had an encounter with a tiger and has a deep scar on his right arm to prove it. He showed it to us proudly...but he is a completely generous and happy man with a smile that never left his face. Pak Teh Rimau lives on top of a pond and he rears fish. Today, they caught a 4 kilogram fish. We had this lady who just skinned the fish almost seemingly effortless and she put it in a box for Dato' to bring it back on the aeroplane to Kuala Lumpur.

For a moment, I felt like it was a comedy show. I was imagining one of Mr Bean's sketches where he's going through customs at the airport with a box. The custom officer opening the box and was aghast at a sight of a fish. The officer exclaimed "I beg your pardon sir but what have you got here?" and Mr Bean answered "A fish!"... of course that was my imagination, there's no such sketch. Well, at least not that I know of but the thought was hilarious...

Dato' then wanted to show us his hometown so, he took us to Chinese Town and then to Pantai Cahaya Bulan. We took some pictures and went on our way to the airport. I can confirm that Kelantan people are very generous, friendly and nice. Dato' was saying how people here live a simple life.

He says in the villages, people are almost self-sufficient. They do not consume a lot... everything is around them, fish, cows, chickens, vegetables, fruits and even paddy fields unlike the Western nations who are dependent on consumable products, on processed items and natural resources... yet, the West does not have a large supply of natural resources whereas these so called 'third world countries' are the ones that have the natural resources, the true richness.

However, the simple life of the people do not require these natural resources... and so, the Western nations they come and they extract from us. Just because the people do not require them, does not mean that they cannot use them for the benefit of the community.

I hate the idea of turning villages into cities... that in order to progress and develop, these areas have to adopt the Western lifestyle and build sky scrapers... I think it is perfectly fine for villages to remain the way they are and to maintain their own way of life, a simple happy life but what is important is the infrastructure for essential public use such as a decent health care system, well equipped hospitals and good health promotion, well equipped schools and libraries.

The Islamic state (Khilafah) was once very rich and the rich people used their wealth for the benefit of the community, they built schools, hospitals, libraries, guest houses and even universities. They used their wealth to help the poor, the needy and they invested their money in translating books, scholarships for young bright students, businesses and agriculture.

This is unlike the Capitalist system today that has made individual pursuit of happiness and profit the most important thing in life. People live to make money so they can buy the house, the car, the millionaire's lifestyle. Everything geared only towards fulfilling selfish needs. Yet, do we find happiness and tranquility in city centres?

Just spending 2 days in Ketereh made me appreciate the real things in life that are important. At one point I was standing there listening to the mooing of a cow, turning around to look at the pond with 1000 fish in it and glancing up to the skies to see the birds flying... that is happiness. When you can truly look around you and appreciate the Creation of Allah SWT, to be grateful with the little or the big things you have in life, to spend time with your friends and family. I wish I could hold on to that moment forever... like treasure it inside a little glass bowl and that I could look at it every so often and remind myself... what really matters.

Monday 17 October 2011

Mom's conversation with daughter about LOVE and LIFE (part 2)

Mom: Lesson no two is VALUE yourself. Allah SWT has given you the highest status. Always remember that you are SPECIAL. You are a Muslim girl.


Daughter: Why are we special?

Mom: We are special because The Prophet SAW says “The whole world is a provision and the best provision is the pious woman”. A woman is an honor in Islam. Allah has given the highest status for moms, wives and daughters so we must value ourselves.

Daughter: What do you mean value ourselves?

Mom: I mean we should never allow any men to touch us without marrying us first. Do you remember the story of Hawa. When Allah SWT created Hawa and Adam woke up and saw her and he wanted to touch her but Allah SWT says he cannot touch her until he married her so, Allah SWT married her to Adam and only after they were married that they could touch and have children. That is the rule of Allah SWT and that is what gives woman honour. A good man will honour you and give you respect. If he wants you, he has to prove himself.

Daughter: What do you mean he has to prove himself?

Mom: It means he has to respect you, meet your parents, propose to you and buy you the diamond ring.

Daughter: (smiling and grinning and looking at her finger) and if he doesn’t show respect, can I kick him?

Mom: Err…yeah. Just tell him to go away. We don’t need a man who doesn’t respect us.

LESSON TWO IS TO PUT A HIGH VALUE ON OURSELVES, THE VALUE GIVEN TO US BY ALLAH SWT, THE BIG BOSS HIMSELF.

Mom: Lesson number three is what women should expect from men. A man has to fulfill three criteria in order to become a real man. The first is to provide.

Daughter: How much does he has to provide?

Mom: A man has to provide everything for his family. He has to go out there and earn a living and make sure there’s food, shelter, clothing and then whatever else that the family needs.

Daughter: What if I work?

Mom: It doesn’t matter if you work or not he still has to provide for you and if he says ‘but you work…’ well, we say but Allah SWT says in surah an Nisa: 34 “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women…” so, we have been given the license by the BIG BOSS that he has to spend his money on us and the family, and when BIG BOSS says something, everyone must listen and follow, right?

Daughter: (grinning and thinking about not having to work) right!

Mom: So, it doesn’t matter if the woman work, the man has to provide and sometimes woman just likes to give and give... but when Allah SWT says something, that is the truth so, man must provide. Whatever we want to share is up to us, we can or we don’t have to, okay? A real man will always pay for the bills, Oh! and dinner...

Daughter: Okay (still grinning)

Mom: Second a man must PROTECT! It is a man’s job to protect. Protect his wife, his family, his community and the Ummah. That is why Allah SWT has made the Jihad an obligation for men. Real men must be out there to protect

Daughter: But a lot of men do not fight jihad!

Mom: Well, by right they should be! They either have to be fighting or have the intention to. Jihad is about protecting the Deen of Islam, protecting the weak and the oppressed. Bottom line, they must protect the women and children. They must protect their family. It is because nowadays men do not fight jihad that many men do not know what to do. Some of them end up becoming Mat Rempit or taking drugs or not doing anything. Men are leaders, they have to lead and they must protect. We really need these real men today...

Daughter: yeah…men shouldn’t be cowards.

Mom: The third is PROMISE. A man must fulfill his promise. A good man will keep his promise. He will be trustworthy.

Daughter: What kind of promise?

Mom: Any kind… if he promises to meet you at a certain time, he should be on time. If he promises to buy you something, he should buy it for you. If he promise to call, he should call. If he promise to get the groceries, he will get the groceries. There are men who are full of sweet but empty promises. They will promise you the world, the sun, the moon and the stars but they do not deliver. Don’t get sucked in by their sweet words… these are not the type of men that can be the leader of the family.

Mom: Let me tell you something...men are either serious about a girl or messing around. Some men only know how to mess around and they are the low-life that we should stay away from. Some men still don't know what they want in life, so leave them alone and let them find themselves but if a man approaches a woman, then he is either serious or messing. If he is serious then he will do the honorable thing and respect you but if he is messing around like saying things like... 'let's see how this goes' then, just LEAVE! Don't stay around. If he is truly serious, he will respect you and say his intentions. Otherwise, just forget it!

Daughter: yeah…because that kind of men is not worth it.

Mom: Well… yes. So, that’s the 3 criteria

Daughter: What about PRAYER?

Mom: Oh yes! What a clever girl! A man must pray to Allah SWT. He has to love Allah SWT and fulfil the most basic command. A man is the leader of the family. He has to lead the prayer and if he doesn’t even pray 5 times a day, there’s a serious problem. So these are the rule of 4 Ps: Provide, protect, promise and prayer.

LESSON NUMBER THREE: REAL MEN HAVE TO FULFILL 4 CRITERIA
1. PRAYER (SOLAT)
2. PROVIDE
3. PROTECT
4. PROMISE (TRUSTWORTHY)

Mom: Oh…there is one more thing. Men are tricksters.

Daughter: What do you mean tricksters?

Mom: Well, sometimes people will use tricks to get what they want like for e.g. to hold someone or to get money from them. One such trick is to threaten to leave if you don't give them what they want.

Daughter: Oh! If that happens we just say ‘bye’ ‘bye’

Mom: Yes…and you know why it is that easy? Well, because you have filled 99% of your heart with the love of Allah SWT. If your heart is filled with the love of Allah SWT then, you will never feel attached to another person and even if you think you like a person… you will never do anything that will anger Allah, like do bad things, things that are against the Shariah. If a person threatens to leave, then they can leave and it is no big deal but if a person who loves Allah SWT will do the honourable thing and respect you and he should not be committing haraam. Remember our value, right?

Daughter: Yeah… (thinking hard)

Mom: So you’ll remember all the things I’ve just said, won’t you?

Daughter: Of course

Mom: InshaAllah. May Allah SWT protect you from syaitan and the evils of this world. May He make you strong in the Deen. Amin.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS TO VALUE OURSELVES AS WOMEN AND TO FILL OUR HEARTS WITH THE LOVE OF ALLAH SWT, THEN WE LEAVE EVERYTHING IN HIS (SWT) HANDS...DO NOT FEAR ANYTHING OR ANYONE BUT ALLAH SWT AND PUT YOUR HOPE AND TRUST ONLY IN HIM.

I hope that this little conversation will be helpful to any mom, any girl out there looking for answers....

Mom's conversation with daughter about LOVE and LIFE (part1)

This is a conversation between a mum and her 12-year old daughter about LOVE, LIFE and RELATIONSHIPS… you may think she is too young but believe me, it is never too young to start understanding these things…


A mum and her daughter sat at a coffee shop. The daughter felt special to spend some quality time with her mom. The mom was having a cup of coffee and a donut whilst the daughter had a cup of tea with a sandwich. They sat in silence for a little while until mom broke the silence and said…

Mom: You know babe, I’m going to give you some advice, something that no one told me when I was growing up and I had to find out myself and sometimes through the hard way. I wish to protect you from all the mistakes I’ve ever made but I know I can’t, only Allah SWT can do that but I hope that I can teach you some things, give you bits of knowledge to help you deal with some serious stuff in your life.

The daughter gave mom a blank stare…as she normally does when mum has something serious to say. Mom is used to that so mom continued…

Mom: I’m going to give you three lessons about life and I want you to listen carefully. These are lessons about LOVE, life and relationships

Daughter: (Blink, still staring into space)

Mom: The first lesson is to fill 99% of your heart with the love of Allah SWT and the Prophet Muhammad (saw) and only leave 1% of your heart for the love of the people. When I say the people I mean everyone including your mom, your dad, your siblings, your family, your friends and in the future, your husband.

Daughter: (Looked perplexed but found the voice to say) Why only 1%?

Mom: Well because people are people, people might disappoint you, they might hurt you, break your trust even your parents might do those things or if you love someone so much and they die… they might still leave you in that way but Allah SWT will never leave you, never disappoint you and will never betray you. When your heart is filled with the love of Allah, no matter what people do to you, you will never feel so bad because your heart is already full but if you do not fill your heart with Allah SWT then, you might end up filling it with rubbish.

Daughter: What kind of rubbish?

Mom: Well…rubbish such as the love of men who is not related to you.

Daughter: Like boyfriends?

Mom: Exactly and once you fill your heart with rubbish, it is not easy to get rid of it.

Daughter: Oh! Like when my room is full of rubbish, it is not easy to tidy it all up?

Mom: Yeah, that’s right.

(by the way, we’re not saying men are rubbish but to fill your heart with someone who is unrelated and irrelevant to you that is like filling your room with rubbish)

SO LESSON ONE IS TO FILL 99% OF YOUR HEART WITH THE LOVE OF ALLAH SWT AND ONLY 1% WITH THE LOVE OF EVERYONE AROUND YOU INCLUDING YOUR PARENTS, SIBLINGS, FAMILY, FRIENDS AND HUSBAND.

PEOPLE CAN HURT YOU, BETRAY YOU OR LEAVE YOU THROUGH DEATH OR OTHER WAYS BUT ALLAH WILL NEVER EVER LEAVE YOU...

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