Patients are our teachers

Throughout my years as a doctor, I have learned so much from patients. It is not just about their symptoms, their diagnosis, their management but also their experiences, their feelings, their joy and their pain. I have learned most precious and valuable lessons from the way they cope with suffering and also in my own reaction towards their responses.

One of the most valuable lessons learned was from this elderly lady who is a known Chronic Bronchitis patient. She is a chain smoker and over the years, it has affected her lungs and she developed COPD (Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease). She was admitted to our wards and that night whilst I was the house-officer on call, she had an acute attack. We gave her oxygen and nebulisers and we tried everything...we really thought she was going to pass but somehow she survived and the next day, as I was on my way to the wards, I found her outside sitting in her wheelchair lighting up a cigarette. From that moment, I promised myself to never light a cigarette...

Some patients have such an impact on me that I will remember them for the rest of my life. During my obstetrics and gynaecology attachment, I had to counsel many patients with miscarriage. With my own experience of miscarriage and a stillbirth, I try to distance myself emotionally from the cases because it hurts. However, one night when I was on call...a Muslim lady came with her husband with very severe stomach pains. She was 36 weeks pregnant. We did a CTG but we couldn't really get a heartbeat and when we did an ultrasound, it was obvious that the baby had died. That night she went through labour and delivered her baby. The next day, I came to visit her after the ward round. I can remember her face, the sadness in her eyes...she looked at me as I entered her room and she smiled. I thought she was the most beautiful person, the most serene and contented person I have ever met. I sat next to her and although she couldn't understand English, I spoke to her. I told her how brave she was and how her baby will wait for her in Jannah then I bent over and kissed her forehead. I have never done that to any patient before or since; but her strength, her patience in the face of adversity made me feel so close to her. She taught me so much about life...about pain...about hope...about love.

I have seen many reactions from patients, those who wail, those who cry and even some who become angry and blame others. There was another lady who had several miscarriages and she came to the emergency department 14 weeks pregnant and she was bleeding. I had to break the bad news to her, she started getting angry and shouting...she asked me "Why is this happening to me?". My blood was boiling and I really felt like shouting back but I realized it was just her reaction at the time. She was angry and she didn't have anyone to direct her anger to. I just happened to be there...so I kept quiet and tried to make her as comfortable as I could. Later she apologized.

The biggest lesson of all...a case I will never forget is a lady who was brought in collapsed (not breathing and with no pulse). The story goes that she was seeing another man and somewhere during the act...she collapsed. Oh God! this was the worse possible nightmare imaginable. I thought to myself...if for a Muslim, to die in that state...in a state of committing haraam, it would be a nightmare of eternity. People often say "It will not happen to me" but I have seen enough cases to say "It can happen to anyone" because illness, accidents and tragedy can happen to anyone, at any time and it is non prejudice...it doesn't exclude the rich, poor, famous, good or bad.

Learn from the strength of others and from their mistakes. Life is too short to make all these mistakes ourselves.

"Some of us learn from other people's mistakes. The rest of us have to be other people" Zig Zaglar

"There are two kinds of doctors. There's the kind that gets rid of their feelings and the kind that keeps them. If you're going to keep your feelings, you're going to feel sick from time to time that's just how it works. People come in here and they're sick, bleeding and dying and they need our help and helping them is more important than how we feel..." ER Mark Greene

I would like to wish to all my final year students due to sit for their Pro-3 exams the very best and may Allah SWT give you success in this exam and for your future careers. I hope you will be the kind of doctors who will keep your feelings and to learn these valuable lessons from your patients. There are so many beautiful people around us...their beauty is not from their looks but from their experiences, their behaviour, their good heart. We just have to open our eyes and see...