The struggles of parents

It is the time of the month again when the pay check comes in and the bills and all expenses have to be settled. Each month my heart sink when I do the calculations. My mom always tells me that bringing up children nowadays are expensive and difficult, unlike the olden days...

I don't know how true she is. I don't know if she simply couldn't remember how difficult it was for her to bring me up and how expensive I was or whether things are getting harder and harder as the Capitalist system puts more pressure on parents and children alike. I try to visualize the lives of people in the past, in previous eras and decades. It must have been difficult living during the time of Prophet Yusuf a.s. when the fear of parents are that your children maybe eaten by wolves, it must have been difficult living during world war 2 in Britain where children were separated from their parents to live away from the cities. It must have been difficult to live during the times of the Japanese invasion in Malaya.

I don't think there was ever a time when raising children was easy or when life was easy. It must have been difficult for our first man and woman, Adam and Hawa having to deal with the envy of Qabil over Habil that lead to the first murder in the history of mankind.

This is the promise of Iblis and his clan when Allah SWT cursed him. Iblis held vengence for Adam and the children of Adam until the end of the days...

قَالَ أَنظِرۡنِىٓ إِلَىٰ يَوۡمِ يُبۡعَثُونَ (١٤) قَالَ إِنَّكَ مِنَ ٱلۡمُنظَرِينَ (١٥) قَالَ فَبِمَآ أَغۡوَيۡتَنِى لَأَقۡعُدَنَّ لَهُمۡ صِرَٲطَكَ ٱلۡمُسۡتَقِيمَ (١٦ثُمَّ لَأَتِيَنَّهُم مِّنۢ بَيۡنِ أَيۡدِيہِمۡ وَمِنۡ خَلۡفِهِمۡ وَعَنۡ أَيۡمَـٰنِہِمۡ وَعَن شَمَآٮِٕلِهِمۡ‌ۖ وَلَا تَجِدُ أَكۡثَرَهُمۡ شَـٰكِرِينَ (١٧) قَالَ ٱخۡرُجۡ مِنۡہَا مَذۡءُومً۬ا مَّدۡحُورً۬ا‌ۖ لَّمَن تَبِعَكَ مِنۡہُمۡ لَأَمۡلَأَنَّ جَهَنَّمَ مِنكُمۡ أَجۡمَعِينَ (١٨)
Surah Al A'raf: 14 - 18

(13) He said, “Then give me respite until a day when all will be resurrected. (14) He (Allah) said, “You are granted respite’’. (15) He said, “Now that You have led me astray, I will certainly sit for them (in ambush) on Your straight path. (16) Then I will come upon them from their front side and from their behind, and from their right and from their left. You will not find most of them grateful. (17) He (Allah) said, “Get out of here, condemned, rejected. Indeed, whosoever will follow you from among them, I will fill Hell with all of you together. (18)

So, that is the promise of Iblis and his only purpose in life. Him and his clan are constantly devising ways and means to fulfill that goal and they can see us from where we do not see them. 

Furthermore, the current system being implemented all over the world is based on the man-made Capitalist system, a secular system that prioritizes freedom, benefit, profit and life's pleasures above everything else. Even as individual Muslims we struggle to reconcile our Islamic values with the values promoted by the secular beliefs e.g. allowing our children to have boyfriends versus free-mixing is not allowed in Islam, letting them watch TV versus surah Al Asr where we should not be wasting time, providing a secure home for our family versus loan with interest (riba) is not allowed. Everything we see, everything we do within this current system is in contradictory to our belief. Sometimes we feel like it is so hard to be a good Muslim but we try anyway, to be the best that we can even thought we know that within the current system, we can never be the best that we truly want to be. 

So, I guess this is the greatest challenge of bringing up children today, bringing them up within a secular system, a secular society and struggling to teach them Islam...

May Allah SWT make it easy for all parents and may Allah SWT bring the Khilafah soon. Ameen.