Hello Malaysia: Let go of ROUTINE...embrace CHAOS

I'm still here...still surviving this urban jungle. Still having that feeling of awe every time I feast my eyes on the Petronas Twin Towers. Still get that 'WOW!' feeling as I watch it light up defining the skyline of Kuala Lumpur. 

The main difference I have identified living in Malaysia compared to UK is the absence of routine. In the UK, life is ruled by routine. Things don't change much in UK apart from the seasons and weather. Every thing else tends to remain the same. Life is predictable. Every day is just the same. Even TV series tend to follow a schedule. Dr Who Christmas special will be followed by a new season. Saturday night is X-factor night. I can imagine our trip to UK, we won't be much surprised! Things will be more or less the same. In some ways that would be reassuring and a comfort. 

In Malaysia however, life is fast paced, unpredictable. One minute there is a park and the next there's a skyscraper. A highway can spring up behind your back garden before you can say 'Why?' Well...okay I'm exaggerating but it feels that way. You can't plan things too far ahead. There's always that impromptu weddings, birthdays, family gatherings and 'teh tarik sessions'. 

In the UK, my friends and I used to make plans to see one another a month ahead but in Malaysia, it is just a phone call away like BRING...BRING..."Hi Assalaamualaikum" 

Me: Wa Alaikum salaam

Friend: What you doing today?

Me: Not sure yet

Friend: I though we could go for coffee

Me: Okay. Sure

Hence, nothing's planned and I've learned to live that way...living day to day. Everyday is a surprise. Yes...life is full of surprises. 

Here's another example.

EMAIL: You are invited to a dinner tonight at blah blah...

Yup! work dinner 

Me sending sms to work collegue 

"Slms. Hi are you going to the dinner tonight?"

Reply: huh? What dinner?

Me: check email

Reply: Oh...are you going?

Me: Yup

Reply: OK

I used to get totally stressed out cause this is so UN-BRITISH, unplanned, un-routined like totally out of the blue and unexpected. Nowadays, I'm just chilled...so chilled. 

Kid: Mom! I've got extra school tomorrow (Sunday)

Me: Okay. What time?

Kid: I have to get there by 6.30am

Me: Okay. 

Yup...whatever. 

I have come to realize that there's nothing in this life that cannot be solved insyaAllah. Whatever comes our way, we will sort it out. Things change and we just need to adapt. No need to get stressed out about it. Worse comes to worse....can always move somewhere else although I love this place so much despite all of its craziness, unpredictability and messed up mentality. I love it here Alhamdulillah. 

For those who question "Why me, God?" Here's a beautiful quote for enduring a calamity

I read this somewhere and it really helped me so I want to share it with everyone

"When a calamity befalls a believer he begins making dua constantly, but he may not see any sign of response for some time. when he is close to despair Allah the Almighty  looks into his heart to see if he is pleased and content with the decree and not hopeless or discouraged. If this is his situation then the response comes quickly. this contentment and pleasure in Allah's decree is what reforms and fixed the iman as well as destroys syaitan. That moment when the believer is close to despair is when the real men/women are determined. So, be aware of why the response is delayed. Understand that he is the Master and that He is the Most Wise in Planning, the Most Knowing of what will lead to the reformation of His slaves. Know that He wants to put you through trials to test what you hide in your heart and that he wants to see your Humility and that He wants to reward you for your patience. Thus, when the trial begins. The supplications are lengthened and the one in hardship shows his need and takes refuge in Allah. He will be content with everything."

Thank you to whoever you wrote this because before I read this, I failed. It was like I was sitting for an exam but I kept failing because I had no clue how to answer the question. Each time the trial occurred and when things got too much, I started questioning God "why?" and the thing was I knew it was wrong to question "why?" and then I felt guilty for doing so...felt bad about myself and I fell into that downward spiral. However, the amazing thing was that God kept pressing the 'RESET' button and each time I failed, He gave me another chance and then I felt that I was back to square one. After reading the above message, I realized that the 'RESET' button that God pressed for me was a blessing, an opportunity for me to sit for the test again, and again, and again until I finally got it right!

I realized that I had to prove myself. I had to go through the trial and actually remain patient, persevere and to accept the test that He put me through. I had to cleanse and purify my heart from the weaknesses hiding in there, and weaknesses I have in abundance. So, I became determined...to prove my worth to God. The trial I went through took its cause and as it progressed, I started looking forward to reach the deepest darkest part in order to prove my worth, to show my patience and acceptance. Alhamdulillah.

Most of us mere mortals will question 'why?' and we may at that deepest darkest point in life even question our faith or say the TABOO WORDS of 'why me God?, why me?"

When someone reaches that pit. Do not judge them. Do not say "Astaghfirullah! you are a bad person!" or accuse them for lack of iman! In truth, I didn't doubt God. I doubted myself. I doubt that I had the strength to go through such test. I doubt that I was able to come out the other side. We just need to keep reminding each other that "Allah does not burden a soul more than one can bear." Remind each other that nothing ever happens in this universe without His permission. We can say to them that "When God put you through the test, He knows that you can handle it. Yes! insyaAllah you are strong enough and that is why the test was given to you." Sometimes the person just needs words of encouragment, a listening ear or perhaps a helping hand.

NB: Thank you for releasing me. I love you. You are beautiful and amazing.