Past...present...future

It is true what is said in the Qur'an as Allah swears "By time! Man is clearly at a loss except those who have Faith and does righteous good deeds, and to remind one another with the Truth and to remind one another with patience." Allah swears by the Time that He, Himself has created that human beings are wasting time...

I'm saying this because...I'm just thinking about six months ago when I was waiting to return to Malaysia; I was dreaming to meet my family again and what kind of life I was going to have and here I am, I have fulfilled my dreams. I have achieved what I wanted to achieve. My feeling of longing for the future, the anticipation is now a reality, it is the present and somethings are already in the past.

Now, I am longing for other things. I am dreaming of next week when I should be getting my new car, when I'll be going to visit Melaka for a family trip, or my dream of going to visit the beach in Pahang at the next school holiday. However, after next week that will be the past and who knows whether I will be going to Melaka or not; but if I do, it will no longer be a dream, an imagination but it will be a memory. Hopefully, a sweet memory.

This is life. We are constantly yearning to get to the next level. As a child, we want to grow up. When we are at University, we want to graduate and work. When we start our jobs, we want to get a promotion. Sooner or later, we will get to where we want to be or maybe not but still, time carries on and it waits for no one.

Sometimes we get broken-hearted and it feels like nothing can ever make the feelings of pain go away and yet, time is a healer. The thing that seems so important and crucial today may not be as important tomorrow. Things that seem very intense today may seem rather trivial tomorrow.

Sometimes after we have achieved what we wanted to achieve and we tend to think, now what? or what's next? This goes on and on until one day we reach the end of our journey and then we understand that is the final destination. That is actually our target and yet, have we prepared for it?

Hence, the surah Al-Asr (The Time) a reminder for me that we are all lost in this world, victims of time and space, rushing herds except those who have Iman and does the righteous good deeds. The deeds prescribed to us by the Creator. It gives another meaning to this life, another level of consciousness.

Roller-coaster ride

Took the children to Berjaya Times Square on Saturday 8th May 2010. At first, we went on the kiddie's ride for Malik and Hadiya. It was nice and relaxing. This was actually our first proper Malaysian outing since we relocated back to KL.

Prior to this, we couldn't really 'pamper' ourselves because there was a lot of bureaucratic things to sort out and we had to live off our savings until we had a job. I feel a bit sad at times because people have the impression that anyone who returns from UK must be loaded with money due to the high exchange rate (or shall I say...previously high exchange rate). Things are different from one person to another and Allah gives his Rizk to whom He Wills. Truth was...we were struggling but Alhamdulillah we had enough to live and to survive. Life in London was expensive, the Rent, the Food, Petrol, Car maintenance, Islamic school fees and it wasn't easy. If someone earns £1200 and you think, "well, that is like RM6000" but the house rent is £730, Food expenses is £200 a month plus £200 on utility bills and petrol...well, you do the maths. It is not all rosy over there.

Alhamdulillah we are fine now and Allah showers His Grace and Bounty to whom He wills; He gives and He can take away and no one has the power but Him. I understand that now. I do not worry about Rizk and I understand that in life, we must work hard and we must excel in everything that we do because we want to be the best; not for Glory, not for wealth, not for status but for the sake of God. It is another sad feeling when you realise how Capitalism has corrupted everything; making MATERIAL BENEFIT the purpose of our action. When people only does things to achieve a material gain and they can't see beyond that. How sincerity is only when you do something for the sake of God.

Anyway, Times Square...

It was a bit expensive so, I thought like it or not I must go on the roller-coaster ride. I'm not a roller-coaster kind of person and never actually been on one in my entire life. Still, I must go on this one just for the experience.

Before that, we went on the Dizzy Izzy and it is like this spinning thing that spins on itself in multidimensional ways. I really felt sick! It is like you're sitting there and your insides are churning and your mind is just thinking when is this going to end. Hence, I was very apprehensive about going on the roller-coaster thinking...if I sit on that seat and plug myself in, I can't get out of it half way.

Anyway, we sat in the roller-coaster Fajar and I and waited. Then, it was time and away we go...Boy! I never screamed so much in my adult life. You know as a young child, you can scream your lungs out and not feel any inhibitions. I still remember those days but as an adult, you bearly scream unless there's some emergency. On that roller-coaster ride, we all screamed. Roller-coaster was nothing like the previous ride. There was no time to even think. It was purely adrenaline rush. It was fast, it was exciting but it was over before you knew it. Fajar's legs became like jelly afterwards. She could bearly carry herself but it was enjoyable. A once in a lifetime experience.